Tag Archives: self-harm

Square One

Spin the clock back a few years. I am spending a morning in Fenwick’s (erstwhile, delightful department store in West London) with my mother. We go to their cafe. I have orange juice. I want orange juice in a carton. … Continue reading

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The scars remain

“the trees are the same through all the sorrowful people who have passed under them, that the stars remain” Sylvia Plath, Letters Home [CONTENT WARNING: SELF HARM] I can’t remember a time when I didn’t bite or scratch or pick at my skin; … Continue reading

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Tumbling

Last Sunday night, I fall. I fall into a mire of suicide ideation and self-loathing. I have just been to visit my mother. Things appeared normal. If family life was normal, then I am bad, bad, bad, for seeking, let … Continue reading

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Eye of the Tiger

I’ve run through email, cleared my inbox, and scheduled the Department’s core social media output for the week. I met last week’s research goal, and feel ready to tackle the one set up for the week ahead. I feel calm. And then … Continue reading

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Beside myself

This has not been an easy week. The trajectory of the week before has continued its spiral, plummetting ever further downwards. The tiredness does not abate no matter how much I sleep, oversleep, rest. Voices chant incessantly at me from … Continue reading

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The Fulfilment of Being

And, Freeze! That’s what  she used to proclaim, suddenly, at us, in drama. Obediently, we would pause, statue-esque, awaiting her instruction. It’s a technique I use years later, running children’s parties. It engenders quiet. Still. Frozen in space is time … Continue reading

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Protected: Blood and Brokenness

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