Tag Archives: anger

Just as I am

Thirteen years ago today, I was baptised. As the minister preached of times of loneliness to come, alongside the joys, I was sinking into my first fully fledged episode of depression. Having a relationship with a personal God had meant … Continue reading

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Order of the Phoenix

Therapy is hard. Most of the past week has been spent entombed in grey and fogginess and gloom. Aside from one day, when I had to be at work out of necessity, for teaching, I remained in bed for as … Continue reading

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Unravelling

This week¬† marks the halfway point of my time in the Therapeutic Community. Over the first three months, I made tangible changes; moved house, reduced working hours, withdrew myself from my parents’ “let’s divorce each other as inhumanely as possible” … Continue reading

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Silk inside a chestnut shell

  Autumn days, when the grass is jewelled And the silk inside a chestnut shell Jet planes meeting in the air to be refuelled All these things I love so well Estelle White The silk inside a chestnut shell. The … Continue reading

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Time for Grace

If and when a horror turns up you will then be given Grace to help you. I don’t think one is usually given it in advance. “Give us our daily bread” (not an annuity for life) applies to spiritual gifts … Continue reading

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Fury, me.

Ten yo: Mummy, why is that lady walking like that? Mummy: She’s drunk. Stupid spastic Oi! Are you drunk? Spastic Spastic! SPASTIC! The voices encircle me. Up the road, on the road that I live on, in town, on my … Continue reading

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Erasure

I am nine years old. S — is standing in front of me, with J— and B— beside her. J—‘s family don’t want to buy a copy of the school class photo’. That’s my fault, because it’s not a class … Continue reading

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